Feb. 19, 2025

No Chill #7: The Episode About Navigating Family Life in a Tech-Filled World

Have you ever wondered how technology might be quietly altering the fabric of your family life? Join us, Lisa and Josh, on "Brother, Sister. Whatever" as we unpack this pressing question, sharing personal stories and insights along the way. We'll open up about the one piece of wisdom we'd impart to our children—Josh's heartfelt advice for Jett and Fallon, and Lisa's steadfast belief in trusting one's gut. Our conversation then shifts towards whether our children are teaching us more about technology than we are teaching them, especially when faced with modern challenges like cyberbullying.

As gadgets continue to infiltrate our dinner tables, we'll peel back the layers on how these digital distractions are reshaping our ability to connect with one another. Can we reclaim those precious family moments from the grip of screens? We’ll share candid reflections on finding a balance between using technology wisely and avoiding addiction, offering practical strategies to combat the urge of mindless scrolling. Through discussing our shifting routines, we aim to uncover activities that can either nourish or drain our mental and spiritual health. Pull up a chair and let's see if we can all learn to look each other in the eye again.

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00:00 - Technology and Family Life Debate

15:54 - Tech-Free Family Dinner Conversations

WEBVTT

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Welcome back to Brother, Sister.

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Whatever, I'm Lisa and I'm Josh, and this is the podcast where we talk about family life and all of the random things that come with it, Some of it deep, some of it funny, but all of it's real.

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Today we're diving into a big one Technology, social media versus family life.

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Is social media bringing us closer together or is it just making us more distracted?

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First, we've got our weekly what if?

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question what if you could magically give your kids one piece of wisdom they'll carry with them forever?

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What would you choose and why this is a good one?

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yeah, me or you.

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You can start if you have one I think I would give two different pieces of advice why like to each kid?

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You mean like one for each kid yeah, and I think I would do that just because, like you, know they're well, gender, sure, but like they're different.

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So it's like I can kind of see the paths already, you know.

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Yeah, so it's like I would kind of see the paths, already.

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You know yeah, so it's like I would kind of give.

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I will allow this.

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So I would say for Jet, my son, if I could give him one piece of wisdom.

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There's so many, there's so many things they need to know.

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You know yeah.

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For him it would probably be like real, real simple.

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You know, do what you love, do something that you love, really stick to the niche or the thing that that you just really enjoy and, and you know, thrive with that.

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Make a business out of it.

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Like you know, like, build that he doesn't need to think about falling into the standard norm of, like okay, got to go to university and I got to, you know, I got to become this or I got to, it's got to be meaningful.

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Or you know, I want him to know that, like he has that entrepreneurial spirit and so like I need him to focus on the thing that's going to bring him the most joy.

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For Jet, that's it.

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And then Fallon.

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I think Fallon is going to kind of go into that mold.

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I just have a feeling.

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So, even though you know the advice is still sound, you can do what you love, right?

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I mean, we try to always.

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I think for her it's going to be something along the lines of just, you know, watch your back.

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You know, I think it would have to do with trust.

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You know, like it would be like keep your friends close and your enemies closer, kind of thing.

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You know, like she's just so sensitive.

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You know which I love about her.

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I'm happy that she's like that, that way that she she is like that.

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But I would say that, you know, don't be like me in the sense of I do good in the world, shouldn't you know?

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Shouldn't people be nice to me, you know, or I'm nice to this person, why isn't this person nice to me?

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I don't get that, you know like.

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So I think she needs to understand that the world doesn't work like that.

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So that would be my piece of advice that the world doesn't work like this.

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Be nice, be kind, expect nothing and just be careful who you trust.

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Those are very good.

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I would have one piece of advice for all three of my kids which would be trust your gut.

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There's a voice there, for a reason.

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That's good.

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And it will never stir you wrong.

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It's true, this is very true.

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I feel like the only times that I've really gotten into trouble right is when I don't listen to that voice.

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So listen to that voice, trust your gut.

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Very good.

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Yeah, I think that that would be mine.

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That's a good one.

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Yeah, they're all great pieces of advice.

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Yeah, for sure.

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Yeah, but it's true, you know your gut never steers you wrong.

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It's true, you know your gut never steers you wrong.

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Yeah, it's true Main topic.

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Mm-hmm.

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Technology today, family dynamics, social media.

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But before we get into all of that, let's start with a little mini fun quiz, so to speak.

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Oh, who do you, who in your family do you think is the most tech savvy?

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to date like I, I think, I think me okay.

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So for me it's definitely going to be james over me.

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Absolutely, it knows a heck of a lot more.

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I'm still trying to figure out the playstation buttons.

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I honestly I feel like the kids these days just come out like literally come out of the womb, knowing how to operate an iPad.

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It's unbelievable.

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How about this?

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I'm going to say, out of my immediate family, I am the least tech savvy.

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And yeah, you're absolutely right.

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I mean, the kids give it another, you know, five years or something, and I'm scared.

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They're going to be, you know.

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Outwitting us all.

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Yes.

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Absolutely no.

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But listen, dad now is into.

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Chat GPT.

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Yeah, I already know.

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Okay.

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He's like I got the this chat, gpt told me this and I'm just like what are you doing?

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How has it changed, even in the last 10 years since we've started, since we've got married and had kids?

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essentially, I mean there's no more peace but.

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But I mean like for the kids there's no more peace.

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I haven't necessarily experienced it yet because obviously my kids are still young.

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Okay.

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But, like you know, you hear about these scenarios where it's like you know, the kids used to be able to come home and it was like it was off.

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You mean like bullying, cyber bullying, that kind of thing.

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Yeah, now it's like, whether you're at school, whether you're home, whether you're on vacation, it's like still happening.

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It's just always there, it's an issue.

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So I definitely think that that's relatively new.

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You know what I mean?

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Well, yeah, Like you can't escape it.

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That scares me Because to a degree, most everyone can say that at some point in their lives, especially as kids, we're bullied In some way, shape or form, to some degree Okay.

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And I'm, I'm one of them and at least when I came home I got to just like there was, like you said, there was that reprieve.

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You know it's like your, your safety net, like your security blanket.

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Yeah, you're safe.

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I don't know how to yeah like handle that?

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I, I don't know like the only way that you could avoid that is by taking away the thing that you fear, so to speak.

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Right, it's like not allowing phones or ipad time or all of that stuff, but like you know what, you know what I mean.

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Yeah, it's like.

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I mean specialists say we should be keeping our kids away from the screens for as long as possible.

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Yes, the specialist that was a little bit more extreme than I was listening to, which was like you know, for example, he would say like you know, my kids, they didn't touch a screen until they were 15, you know?

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Okay, but how?

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old are they now?

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But you know, my point is, you know, is that and if the kids are 15 now, what stage was technology at when they were kids?

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Right right.

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Certainly not the stage it's at now.

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So like let's compare oranges to oranges.

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Yeah, but I guess he's saying that, you saying that even if you have kids right now, those kids should not have screen time until at least they're into their teens, like 15, 16, etc.

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Which I feel is impossible.

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I do, I do too.

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I mean, I feel like that is absolutely impossible, as much as I like that statement.

00:08:08.819 --> 00:08:11.348
I like that statement, but show me how.

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It's because he talks about the brain.

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He talks about what it's doing to the brain, basically talking about how when they do the neuro scans on the brain, it looks like the brain is dying, you know, like cells that would spark normally are not sparking anymore, you know, and it's because of how like.

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And then this goes into his theory of depression and anxiety, and you know, you know.

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So it's interesting, it's interesting.

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Yeah, and terrifying all at once.

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Yeah, so, okay.

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So we went from like texting was a big thing, oh yeah, and do you remember when it used to be?

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Well, texting is taking over the phone calls, right, like nobody talks anymore, they only text.

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Yeah.

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But then FaceTime and video calling has come kind of had that resurgence.

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So that's nice.

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I feel like those are all great ways to keep in touch, right, covid?

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Do you know what we did for New Year's Eve?

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Instead of going over to a friend's house like we used to, we FaceTimed.

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We each had our own little snacks and champagne and the whole shebang, and we FaceTimed for the evening.

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Oh, my goodness.

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So think about it.

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Those are kind of nice options to have right.

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Yeah.

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To have a connection with somebody or with several people group chats and stuff like that that you wouldn't normally have.

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When does the line get crossed where it's almost like you're relying on those things and now you're not making the effort to go see somebody in person, right?

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You're not traveling to go see that person anymore because you well, we've got FaceTime or we've got this right.

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Yeah, yeah, I think, um, I think I've seen, not that, like you know, I'm, I'm looking, I can see the whole world or anything, but I don't know if it's just me personally or if I'm seeing it a little like Zoom and you know FaceTime and it's like, oh my gosh, this is great.

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But I feel like all of a sudden, people are like, you know, I miss connecting, I miss touch, I miss, you know, like there's it's almost like people are retracting a little bit.

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At least that's what I've felt, you know, a little bit For sure, there's definitely pros and felt you know a little bit For sure.

00:11:05.721 --> 00:11:19.491
There's definitely pros and cons, right Pros and cons to both the screen time at home, what's recommended versus what we allowed, I don't know, kind of like I know that I definitely struggle with that.

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It's definitely something that I do not have a handle on.

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Do you know what I mean With the kids a handle on, do you like?

00:11:26.053 --> 00:11:38.210
With the kids you mean yeah, with the kids same, but even with myself yeah, same, I don't really have a a good you know grasp on it, like I'll just kind of be like whatever I have some.

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I see some parents where they're so like boom, boom, boom.

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It's like the kids know and I'm like fuck, I'm like that's like really good, you know like that is very good, that's what I should do.

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You know, but also you know, sometimes I wonder if it's just a front, because I'm there, I'm just saying you know.

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I'm just saying you know, it's something I think about look at it even from your own perspective.

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How many times do you sit down to watch a TV show and you're also on your phone?

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I'll say the one, for sure it's like you can't concentrate on one thing, even if it's a fun thing.

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You know what?

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I agree, and I'm definitely not going to bullshit and say I don't do those things I do.

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But you know what I've noticed changed a lot, but I go to bed around eight.

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I noticed that because of that I'm doing a lot less screen time.

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Now let me explain though, because I know obviously I'm sleeping.

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but but what I the drug okay, where I would usually get it at eight to nine, nine to ten, ten to eleven, I feel like, because I've starved the drug, because I'm just I'm sleeping, it's almost like during the day I've noticed and it's actually only right now that we're talking about it I almost feel like I notice like there's a little bit more of a disconnect for me with the phone now.

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I feel like I notice like there's a little bit more of a disconnect for me with the phone now and I'm like, huh, and I'm like and the only thing I could possibly think to relate it to- Would be that change.

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Would be the change that I have four or five hours every day now, consistently, where I'm not on the phone because I'm I'm in bed, but but normally before I would do that, I would, of course, be in bed or I would be, you know, on my phone or looking, scrolling, you know, for an hour or this or that or whatever, and so that is a cumulative right.

00:13:41.922 --> 00:13:59.534
So I think it's definitely helped, you know, and um, and I wonder if it goes deeper than that, maybe that affects how my mood has been, maybe that affects how you know, because I'm doing a lot of self, you know like I'm working out, I'm doing.

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So, you know, there's a lot of things that could be factoring into how I feel that any addiction, whether it's good or bad, I think if you are starving it a little bit, I think you will automatically feel a little bit better.

00:14:17.804 --> 00:14:22.167
Yeah, I just realized that this is something I do on purpose.

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I watch TV on my phone, and the reason why I do that is because I can't scroll, so I watch like Netflix on my phone.

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I wonder if that's why I do it.

00:14:33.815 --> 00:14:35.716
And then that way you know like.

00:14:35.736 --> 00:14:36.717
Subconscious thought.

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That way I can't do anything right.

00:14:38.678 --> 00:14:45.085
No, that's true, but if you're watching it on TV and you have your phone, well then, you're going to like scroll through stuff.

00:14:45.164 --> 00:14:51.745
It's almost like you have to have, like you have to have your hands busy with something it's habit, I don't know.

00:14:51.806 --> 00:14:55.554
It's habit, and this is what I mean when you.

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I challenge you to do an experiment and to figure out a time, a time when you would normally be on your phone.

00:15:06.809 --> 00:15:08.517
Hands down as soon as I wake up.

00:15:08.970 --> 00:15:09.191
Okay.

00:15:09.191 --> 00:15:18.000
So I want you to try to do the same thing when you wake up for an hour try even just one hour where you're not going to check that phone.

00:15:18.000 --> 00:15:19.370
You're not going to do anything.

00:15:19.370 --> 00:15:27.417
And I'm telling you, if you get that consistently going and then you start adding a bit more time, see what it does to you.

00:15:27.417 --> 00:15:33.149
You know, either you're going to want to kill me or you're going to notice something.

00:15:34.653 --> 00:15:35.998
No, you know what Challenge accepted.

00:15:35.998 --> 00:15:39.219
I'm going to try that because I find that that's.

00:15:39.219 --> 00:15:47.837
There's scientific proof, Josh, that that kind of thing fucks with your brain in many ways.

00:15:48.318 --> 00:15:54.783
Do you ever get and you know I'm not judging, judging anyone, including on my side okay, okay.

00:15:54.783 --> 00:15:57.475
So if you're listening, relax, okay.

00:15:57.475 --> 00:16:05.881
But do you ever get the the scenario where it's like person's on the phone and like you walk in you're like hey, how's it going?

00:16:05.881 --> 00:16:09.821
It's like hey, like maybe they'll give you the eye contact, but then it's like right back to the phone.

00:16:09.821 --> 00:16:12.775
That kind of you know it.

00:16:12.775 --> 00:16:16.403
Just it bothers me a little bit and it's that obsession.

00:16:16.403 --> 00:16:37.020
So like I come in and the kids, you know, are like on their iPad and, like you know, they lift their eyes, you know, to, oh, hey, daddy, you know like they're happy, but then it's like right back to the iPad and like I don't know, for me it's like, eh, you know if it was homework or okay, but it's like you know, is it that important?

00:16:37.020 --> 00:16:40.860
Like you can't just put down your, your phone for five seconds.

00:16:41.602 --> 00:16:43.128
I I'm guilty of that for sure.

00:16:43.830 --> 00:16:44.551
Yeah, absolutely.

00:16:44.551 --> 00:16:52.722
And and don't get me wrong, I bet you, as I'm saying it, there's probably little flashbacks happening in my head where I probably do it.

00:16:52.722 --> 00:16:54.105
You know what I mean?

00:16:54.105 --> 00:16:54.806
No, of course.

00:16:55.509 --> 00:17:01.123
Like I mean, james and I have had conversations where we're both on our phone and we're talking to each other at the same time.

00:17:01.182 --> 00:17:01.383
Yeah.

00:17:01.669 --> 00:17:03.335
Like yeah, yeah.

00:17:06.111 --> 00:17:08.519
You know, it's just, it's completely taken over.

00:17:08.740 --> 00:17:08.940
Yeah.

00:17:09.373 --> 00:17:10.163
And I.

00:17:10.265 --> 00:17:10.589
I agree.

00:17:10.589 --> 00:17:23.433
I truly believe in the art of looking somebody in the eye is dying oh yeah when looking somebody in the eye while speaking yeah is dying, it is is absolutely dying.

00:17:23.534 --> 00:17:25.420
Yeah, what is this tech?

00:17:25.440 --> 00:17:33.060
free family time well, we you know what, I can't even say that with a straight face have Friday family fun day.

00:17:33.060 --> 00:17:39.978
We might sit down and watch a movie, and I make sure that the kids don't have the iPads, but I'm still there with my fucking phone.

00:17:39.978 --> 00:17:43.134
I mean, come on, I'm just as bad.

00:17:44.490 --> 00:17:51.690
We don't even really have a non For it to be a non-tech moment.

00:17:51.690 --> 00:17:57.201
It would be something like we're at ISO or we're at Cineplex.

00:17:57.201 --> 00:18:01.459
I agree that's the only way that it will be complete.

00:18:01.459 --> 00:18:13.877
But if it has something to do with being at home, chances are there's going to be some tech somewhere, and I embrace it in many ways.

00:18:13.877 --> 00:18:23.903
I just feel like there's a difference from being obsessed and using it as a tool.

00:18:24.710 --> 00:18:25.632
I have two points.

00:18:25.632 --> 00:18:33.590
The first point was going to be it feels like it could be obsession, but I actually don't think that's the right word.

00:18:33.590 --> 00:18:40.523
I feel like it's a mindless activity.

00:18:40.523 --> 00:18:45.993
It's a mindless habit that sometimes you don't even know you're doing it.

00:18:45.993 --> 00:18:49.300
Obsession feels intentional, almost.

00:18:49.761 --> 00:18:50.383
Do you know what I mean?

00:18:50.383 --> 00:18:54.438
So then that would sound like addiction.

00:18:54.438 --> 00:18:54.538
Yeah.

00:18:55.579 --> 00:19:00.242
Yes, yeah, exactly Like a mindless, like it's an addiction.

00:19:00.242 --> 00:19:01.584
Yeah Well, you're an addict.

00:19:01.584 --> 00:19:04.586
Absolutely yes, oh, for sure.

00:19:04.846 --> 00:19:05.105
Same.

00:19:05.487 --> 00:19:06.426
I mean.

00:19:06.646 --> 00:19:09.449
I don't know how many people are not addicts in that category.

00:19:09.608 --> 00:19:10.730
Yeah, there you go Right.

00:19:10.730 --> 00:19:14.471
Second point Second point is one of the things that I've tried.

00:19:14.471 --> 00:19:22.737
You're going to laugh at me when I say this is leaving my phone out of distance to me.

00:19:23.038 --> 00:19:23.617
That's not crazy.

00:19:23.619 --> 00:19:24.702
So if I'm sitting on the sofa.

00:19:24.702 --> 00:19:29.948
I'm leaving my phone like 10 feet away, right, so that I can focus on whatever.

00:19:29.948 --> 00:19:39.330
So I'm being intentional about it Okay, partly because I'm too lazy to get up and go walk for it.

00:19:39.612 --> 00:19:45.469
It's hard, what's the first thing that you check, like, what's the first thing that you look at when you look at?

00:19:45.528 --> 00:19:47.232
What do you think it's social media?

00:19:48.279 --> 00:19:50.064
So like Facebook and stuff.

00:19:50.786 --> 00:19:50.945
Yeah.

00:19:50.945 --> 00:19:55.244
Like scrolling, yes, scrolling, aimless scrolling, and for me it's Insta.

00:19:55.244 --> 00:20:00.205
That's my fucking cocaine.

00:20:00.626 --> 00:20:03.251
Yeah, it's ridiculous.

00:20:04.053 --> 00:20:06.603
I will literally have just checked it to death.

00:20:07.244 --> 00:20:07.505
Yeah.

00:20:07.665 --> 00:20:09.269
And then I'll go back and check it again.

00:20:09.609 --> 00:20:12.080
Yeah, yeah, you see, I'm telling you.

00:20:12.080 --> 00:20:28.717
I used to be just the same and, believe it or not, I'm not very much like that anymore and I'm convinced it's because I'm getting four or five hours of no phone time where normally I would be.

00:20:29.039 --> 00:20:47.671
It's because you've realized you've narrowed it down to where your scrolling time was these hours where you would just be relaxing, chilling, these hours where you would just be relaxing, chilling, but because your habits have changed in terms of sleep and working out and all of that stuff.

00:20:47.671 --> 00:20:53.747
It's naturally progressed to where those times are now not there for you anymore.

00:20:54.000 --> 00:20:58.243
So you know, I think it's about trying to break the habit, the addiction.

00:20:58.243 --> 00:21:02.068
If you want Some people don't want to, that's fine.

00:21:03.201 --> 00:21:04.988
I think there's a time and a place for it.

00:21:05.520 --> 00:21:05.982
That's where.

00:21:06.064 --> 00:21:06.987
I struggle with it.

00:21:06.987 --> 00:21:26.214
I think it's okay to just scroll and watch a couple of YouTube videos or go on Instagram and scroll for a couple of minutes, but it's when you're sitting there for like hours and like life is passing you by, that's when I feel like, okay, you need to get a hold of this.

00:21:26.214 --> 00:21:29.547
Yeah, nonsense, but we can we can argue with that.

00:21:29.928 --> 00:21:32.272
You know, like, don't be too hard on yourself.

00:21:32.272 --> 00:21:32.653
We.

00:21:32.653 --> 00:21:37.428
Someone you know, I don't know, painting a hobby.

00:21:37.428 --> 00:21:41.375
Uh, you know, hours is passing them by.

00:21:41.375 --> 00:21:43.684
Someone who plays a video game.

00:21:43.684 --> 00:21:45.029
Hours is passing them by.

00:21:47.500 --> 00:21:57.413
Yeah, but I think it goes back to what I was kind of talking about in the last episode about self-care and self-indulgence.

00:21:57.413 --> 00:22:04.903
It's like now it's not a bad, like painting a picture for hours is a much.

00:22:04.903 --> 00:22:19.230
You're targeting areas of your brain and your spirit that are actually uplifting you and giving you something, as opposed to these activities that are mindless.

00:22:19.230 --> 00:22:22.285
That are actually taking away.

00:22:22.424 --> 00:22:23.405
Like doom scrolling.

00:22:23.405 --> 00:22:24.848
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:22:24.929 --> 00:22:25.309
You know what I?

00:22:25.349 --> 00:22:28.875
mean yeah, no, that makes sense yeah that's true, that's true.

00:22:28.875 --> 00:22:50.088
Really, it just really enlightened me a little bit yeah even playing a video game, I guess, technically, or you're sparking cognitive, you know yes sparking cognitive, you know, but again playing a video game, or even scrolling, in and of itself is not.

00:22:50.108 --> 00:22:50.612
Oh my God, how dare you?

00:22:50.612 --> 00:22:52.019
You know you're a horrible human being for doing stuff like that.

00:22:52.019 --> 00:22:56.090
No, it has its moment, but that's it.

00:22:56.090 --> 00:23:02.490
Let it have its moment a small moment in time, and then move on to other productive things.

00:23:02.490 --> 00:23:03.953
You know what I mean.

00:23:03.953 --> 00:23:05.359
Don't let it take over.

00:23:05.359 --> 00:23:12.371
That, for me, is where there's a fine line that I'm still trying to navigate.

00:23:13.291 --> 00:23:13.792
Makes sense.

00:23:13.792 --> 00:23:14.934
Yeah, yeah.

00:23:15.075 --> 00:23:17.268
Yeah, I by no means have it all figured out.

00:23:17.268 --> 00:23:24.314
And when you don't have it figured out as an individual, how the fuck, Josh, am I supposed to teach other people about it?

00:23:24.314 --> 00:23:26.923
Ie kids, my children.

00:23:26.923 --> 00:23:34.315
How am I supposed to talk to them and tell them with a straight face hey, you really need to be, you know?

00:23:34.960 --> 00:23:36.962
I understand where you're coming from.

00:23:36.962 --> 00:23:41.269
It's like you know if I'm, if I'm smoking cigarettes and I'm like, hey, don't smoke.

00:23:41.369 --> 00:23:42.270
It's bad for you.

00:23:42.270 --> 00:23:43.713
Do what I say and not as I do.

00:23:44.173 --> 00:23:53.509
Yeah, you know, like like I get that, don't get me wrong, but it's like you know, you know, okay, you come home like you have homework, you have this to do, you have that to do.

00:23:53.509 --> 00:24:00.603
It's like I'm I'm, I'm done my homework.

00:24:00.603 --> 00:24:01.026
You know what I mean.

00:24:01.026 --> 00:24:01.549
Like I'm done that stuff.

00:24:01.549 --> 00:24:02.234
Dad, why are you on the phone then?

00:24:02.234 --> 00:24:02.839
If I can't go on the phone?

00:24:02.839 --> 00:24:05.989
Well, because my responsibilities are done right now.

00:24:05.989 --> 00:24:09.009
True, you know, like you have your responsibilities.

00:24:09.259 --> 00:24:12.830
Here's the thing bringing up like, specifically at the dinner table.

00:24:12.830 --> 00:24:17.490
We actually, for dinners only, have made it tech-free.

00:24:17.971 --> 00:24:18.673
Oh, I like that.

00:24:18.673 --> 00:24:19.540
Good for you.

00:24:19.882 --> 00:24:23.944
And we've actually been really good at keeping it tech-free.

00:24:24.528 --> 00:24:28.884
Well, what's great about that is that you can actually have conversations.

00:24:28.884 --> 00:24:30.087
That's the thing.

00:24:30.730 --> 00:24:31.421
Do you know what I mean?

00:24:31.421 --> 00:24:35.582
It's like I've always loved, like growing up, that's what we did.

00:24:35.582 --> 00:24:47.553
We sat at the table with mom and dad, we discussed our day and, even if we didn't have much to say and we ate in silence sometimes right, it was just that vibe.

00:24:47.712 --> 00:24:47.913
Yeah.

00:24:48.059 --> 00:24:49.403
And I kind of love that.

00:24:49.403 --> 00:24:58.568
I really miss that right, that it's like simpler times, you know, when you weren't so easily distracted by like everything.

00:24:58.568 --> 00:25:03.127
And you know we've talked about this, being bored and having imagination, all those things, right, yeah, it's true.

00:25:03.127 --> 00:25:06.703
And so James and I said, let's, let's do this.

00:25:06.703 --> 00:25:08.929
You know, it's that one time.

00:25:08.929 --> 00:25:22.741
Now we've tried overhauling a lot of other times, like you know a lot of other things and bringing in rules, and some stick, some don't, but this has been something that's stuck and I'm really liking that.

00:25:22.741 --> 00:25:24.865
Now you mentioned about work.

00:25:24.865 --> 00:25:31.932
Because you own your own business, you're self-made, self-employed.

00:25:31.932 --> 00:25:44.279
Do you find it hard to have that line, or do?

00:25:44.299 --> 00:25:48.522
you have a line at all when it comes to business and tech and family time?

00:25:48.522 --> 00:25:54.547
And and all of that I have only recently started to really change that.

00:25:54.547 --> 00:25:57.989
Before, work was number one.

00:25:57.989 --> 00:26:01.270
It was the most important thing Versus now.

00:26:01.270 --> 00:26:05.133
I could give a fuck, really, you know, about the job.

00:26:05.133 --> 00:26:11.336
I love what I do, always will, but it's not the same thing at all, you know.

00:26:11.477 --> 00:26:18.626
So your mindset has changed, then my mindset has completely changed, you know, and is this around the same time as when?

00:26:18.626 --> 00:26:21.532
Like habits, like your sleeping habits, all of that.

00:26:21.532 --> 00:26:24.173
So it's kind of all coincides, it all coincides.

00:26:24.461 --> 00:26:44.329
It all coincides, you know, and now I really make sure that I have time to cook to, you know, to eat, to spend time with the kids, to just really be involved and be there, compared to just never being there.

00:26:45.060 --> 00:26:48.144
So would you say it's priorities, then it's a priority shift.

00:26:48.420 --> 00:26:57.313
Yeah, priority shift for sure, and just realizing that, no matter how much money I make, I'll always need more money.

00:26:59.701 --> 00:27:00.425
Yeah, that's true.

00:27:00.700 --> 00:27:03.769
I'm constantly never happy, you know.

00:27:04.140 --> 00:27:07.185
You're always striving for that next thing, yeah, and don't get me wrong.

00:27:07.619 --> 00:27:11.601
This is really the power of an entrepreneur Like.

00:27:11.601 --> 00:27:14.906
That's how entrepreneurs have to be, to a degree.

00:27:15.441 --> 00:27:16.559
Yeah, well, that's what I'm saying.

00:27:16.559 --> 00:27:16.906
And when?

00:27:16.926 --> 00:27:19.808
they're not and they get into a comfortable state.

00:27:19.808 --> 00:27:21.611
That's when things go saying and when they're not and they get into a comfortable state, that's when things go bad.

00:27:21.611 --> 00:27:24.781
But I don't know, I guess I'm just.

00:27:24.781 --> 00:27:33.259
I'm at the age now where my brain has just shifted and it's not so much, it's not so important to me anymore.

00:27:33.259 --> 00:27:35.942
Okay, those things exactly.

00:27:36.281 --> 00:27:43.769
I could kind of understand how that would be, especially for entrepreneurs.

00:27:43.769 --> 00:27:52.336
In my head anyway, I think more so than the nine to fivers, so to speak like myself that it's a different mindset.

00:27:52.336 --> 00:28:01.595
Like, if I don't answer that text or that call or that email, that could be potential business that I'm losing, right yeah?

00:28:01.595 --> 00:28:08.253
What about sharing things about our kids on social media?

00:28:08.253 --> 00:28:09.945
How do you feel about that?

00:28:11.782 --> 00:28:12.886
I'm a little numb to it.

00:28:12.886 --> 00:28:18.030
I know some people are very, you know like they have their opinions.

00:28:18.030 --> 00:28:22.082
Yeah, yeah, yeah you know, like they have their opinions.

00:28:22.082 --> 00:28:23.846
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know I'll be doing a workout and Jet wants to.

00:28:23.846 --> 00:28:28.741
You know, join me and and we have a picture together and I post it on my Instagram.

00:28:28.741 --> 00:28:34.843
Or you know, versus, like, I have some people where, uh, they post a picture and, like, the face is covered.

00:28:34.903 --> 00:28:38.008
Yeah, like a little heart emoji or something like that.

00:28:38.008 --> 00:28:40.873
Yeah, you know which is cool.

00:28:40.873 --> 00:28:41.615
You know I get it.

00:28:41.615 --> 00:28:46.652
Yeah, I would say I'm a little bit more relaxed in that regard.

00:28:47.099 --> 00:28:50.432
Do you have two, let's say, for example, instagram or even Facebook?

00:28:50.432 --> 00:28:51.798
Do you have two separate accounts?

00:28:51.798 --> 00:28:53.980
Yeah, like your personal one versus your business?

00:28:53.980 --> 00:29:02.886
Yeah, so do you have settings on your personal account where it's like only friends can see your pictures and stuff like that?

00:29:03.007 --> 00:29:04.667
Or is it more public For Facebook?

00:29:04.667 --> 00:29:07.450
Yes, for Instagram it's more public.

00:29:07.529 --> 00:29:08.130
It's more public.

00:29:08.130 --> 00:29:11.413
Okay, I'm always like scrolling but I'm never posting.

00:29:11.413 --> 00:29:12.673
Do you know what I mean?

00:29:12.673 --> 00:29:30.386
So, like everyone, maybe twice a year I'll post like something with the kids, and when I do I'm not too worried about it because my settings are like pretty strong so to speak and like only friends can see it and it's not available for public view and blah, blah, blah.

00:29:30.386 --> 00:29:33.643
The whole argument is they don't get to make that decision for themselves, right?

00:29:33.844 --> 00:29:41.321
right and so until they can make that decision for themselves, they're gonna like hide them or cover their faces or whatever.

00:29:41.321 --> 00:29:44.932
But then why bother posting at all?

00:29:45.913 --> 00:29:46.315
Well, yeah.

00:29:47.017 --> 00:29:47.719
In my that's.

00:29:47.719 --> 00:29:54.073
I'm just kind of like, okay, I, I, I respect and understand that argument, but then why bother putting it up at all?

00:29:54.073 --> 00:29:54.500
Yeah.

00:29:54.560 --> 00:30:00.310
And, and to me I guess it's not even a big deal, you know, so like if they get older and they're like dad.

00:30:00.310 --> 00:30:06.637
I'm so upset that I'm on you know your Instagram like my baby pictures, then, okay, I'll delete them.

00:30:06.939 --> 00:30:14.094
Yeah, if you could get rid of one piece of tech from your house, what would it be, and why?

00:30:16.079 --> 00:30:23.489
I know it's going to sound crazy, but if I could get rid of one piece of tech, I think I would probably get rid of the iPads.

00:30:23.489 --> 00:30:29.095
Yeah yeah, believe it or not, yeah, see.

00:30:29.836 --> 00:30:31.845
So here's the thing Do they each have their own iPad?

00:30:32.165 --> 00:30:32.828
Yeah, okay.

00:30:32.828 --> 00:30:48.984
But also there's a double standard to that, and the double standard is like it's nice when, like, I need to get something done and instead of them being all over the place, they're quietly on the couch on their iPads and I'm like, okay, good.

00:30:48.984 --> 00:30:50.592
They're they're doing their thing.

00:30:50.813 --> 00:30:52.901
It's convenient when it's convenient for us.

00:30:52.901 --> 00:30:57.890
It's good for them to have the iPad when it's convenient for us.

00:30:58.109 --> 00:30:58.590
So true.

00:30:58.912 --> 00:31:01.000
And it's so true, I would do the same thing.

00:31:01.000 --> 00:31:05.509
To be honest, the iPads, video games and and all of that stuff.

00:31:05.509 --> 00:31:08.742
It's not as predominant in our house.

00:31:08.742 --> 00:31:13.432
I mean, they love that, but it's not an everyday law.

00:31:13.673 --> 00:31:14.759
Yeah, you know yeah.

00:31:15.382 --> 00:31:16.143
Yeah exactly.

00:31:16.143 --> 00:31:17.105
But then you get what.

00:31:17.105 --> 00:31:17.726
What would happen?

00:31:17.726 --> 00:31:19.429
You get rid of the iPads, and what then?

00:31:19.429 --> 00:31:21.092
Now, all of a sudden, video games would become?

00:31:21.432 --> 00:31:21.853
Probably.

00:31:21.952 --> 00:31:22.734
Probably right.

00:31:22.734 --> 00:31:24.644
So I think you're fucked, no matter what.

00:31:25.125 --> 00:31:26.670
Yeah, you're right, you're right.

00:31:27.191 --> 00:31:27.531
All right.

00:31:27.531 --> 00:31:29.385
Well, that's it for today's episode.

00:31:29.385 --> 00:31:34.230
Let us know Do you think social media is helping or hurting family life?

00:31:34.230 --> 00:31:44.133
And don't forget to answer our what if question in the comments or message us on Instagram.

00:31:44.133 --> 00:31:50.404
Make sure to follow us, subscribe and share the podcast at brothersisterwhatever, and, as always we'll see you next time on Brother, Sister, Whatever.

00:31:50.965 --> 00:31:51.866
Bye guys, Bye.