Jan. 30, 2025
No Chill #4: The Episode About Modern Adulthood
Ever dreamt of skipping out on adult responsibilities forever? Picture this: no bills to pay, no mandatory social events—just pure, unadulterated freedom. In our latest episode of Brother, Sister, Whatever, we, Lisa and Josh, explore these tempting "what if" scenarios as we navigate the unpredictable terrain of adulting. With humor and honesty, we unravel the stark contrasts between our childhood fantasies of adulthood and the often chaotic reality we face today. From financial burdens to societal expectations, we remind ourselves that nobody truly has it all figured out, and that's perfectly okay.
We also take a trip through the evolving world of work, where social media and cryptocurrencies are transforming what it means to have a career. Trading traditional corporate paths for the entrepreneurial roads of gaming and influencing, we weigh the pros and cons of flexibility versus stability. Personal stories highlight our quest for balance, happiness, and financial stability, whether through entrepreneurship or more conventional gigs. With a dash of laughter and a sprinkle of chaos, we invite you to embrace the messiness of growing up alongside us—and maybe share a laugh over your own adulting fails on social media!
Thanks for hanging out with us on Brother Sister Whatever!
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New episodes every other Thursday.
Bring your feelings. We’ll bring ours.
00:00 - Navigating Adulting and Responsibilities
08:03 - Changing Opportunities and Work-Life Balance
15:16 - Embracing the Chaos of Adulting
WEBVTT
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Happy Thursday everyone.
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I'm Lisa.
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And I'm Josh.
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This is a brother, sister, whatever.
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Two siblings, no chill and a whole lot of oversharing.
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Today we are deep diving into the all too relatable topic of adulting.
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One word overrated.
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Let's talk about why no one prepared us for this mess and if anyone actually has it all together.
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But first it's time for our weekly what if, where we take a wild, unexpected question and let our imaginations run free.
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Here's this week's question.
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What if adults could just opt out of one responsibility forever?
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Which one would you choose?
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Let's see where this takes us.
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Okay, there's many things that I would like to opt out of in adulthood, but I think the biggest one for me would be paying bills.
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I mean, is that really an adulting responsibility?
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Well, yeah, you don't do that as kids.
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Like kids, kids Like to me.
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I consider a 25-year-old a kid.
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No, no, no, I do.
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Is that 25-year-old still living at home?
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Some are, I guess, Well yes, some are, but in your head this elusive 25-year-old kid.
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I don't know.
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I guess maybe even both sides of it.
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You know, I don't know.
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Yeah, I guess you're right.
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Yeah, I guess bills is a big thing, yeah.
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Any age.
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Wouldn't you want to opt out of paying bills?
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Yeah, yeah, of course, basically to be rich.
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Basically, to have the money that you've earned.
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Right.
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All to yourself, without you know giving it to the man.
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Well, you know Dubai, you pay no taxes.
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I know, I know, and so everything is yours.
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So for I guess it's for the obvious reasons I get to do what I want, keep what I want.
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Yeah, I feel like that frees up a lot of things.
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Right, so not only do you have that money, but that money.
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Then that also brings freedom Freedom to travel.
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So does this mean, you're not working?
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No, you would still work.
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I'm cool with working.
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I just don't want my money.
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I want my money to be mine, like all mine, and still have everything else too.
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What about you.
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Oh man, I don't know, that's really tough.
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I mean, obviously it's very tempting to just say the same thing Endless money, or not paying bills, either, or would be good.
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But I guess, if I had to say one thing, that I would opt out of adulting.
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I just want to be by myself.
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Really.
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Yeah, you know I do it for work, right?
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I'm managing people's lives pretty much from my profession.
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I'm a mediator, I'm a psychologist, I'm answering people's calls at 10 o'clock at night and I'm fine with all that.
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It's my job, it's what I love, but it also leaves me kind of tanked.
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It depletes you.
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Yeah, so to sit at a table, it just doesn't interest me.
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I would never do this if you weren't my sister.
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Really.
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Like even this right now?
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Yeah, no, there's no way.
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Way, I love it, I love what we're doing, I love all of this, but to do it with someone like just because no way does that make sense.
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Yes, it's the pretense of it all, really, because there are moments, I'm sure, like you said, like this kind of a scenario, this vibe, you and I, you're, you're enjoying it and you've come to the table wanting it, as opposed to certain social situations where it's being kind of almost thrust upon you and you don't want it and therefore the pretense that needs to follow that, in order to Wow, you just enlightened me actually.
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You know what I think it is what?
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Wow, you just enlightened me actually.
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You know what I think it is what?
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I don't have anything in common with that person.
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So for me to sit down and like have a conversation, like I don't know what to talk about, I know that might be very small-minded like, because, sure, if I sat down with someone that like had like one of the passions I have shoot, I'm sure we could really get into it yes but, but it's always like the same.
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So it's mostly the expectations of it.
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Well, what am I going to say?
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Like, oh well, you know, I lifted, you know, 225 today at the gym.
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It's hard for me to find a rhythm with other people.
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Maybe that's where my autism comes from.
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I'm just one of those lone wolf type of people.
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Well, I could kind of relate to that a little bit in the sense of I have my few little people that I like, I enjoy their company, but to seek out new individuals and new social settings and all that, that's kind of not really my vibe either.
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Yeah, I kind of get.
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It has nothing to do with likability.
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That was a little deep for a weekly.
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What if huh?
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I know let's talk about kind of like the illusion that we were sold about adulthood, how we, as kids, perceived adulthood.
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What is the first thing that comes to your mind Like?
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put yourself back in the mindset.
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I can't wait to get out there you go right.
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Yeah.
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Can't wait to get out, make up my own rules.
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That was a big thing for me.
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I remember feeling oh, I can't wait to get out so I don't have to listen to anybody.
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Yeah, we thought it was going to be so greener on the other side.
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Absolutely.
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I think most kids go through that.
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Now, of all those things that we mentioned perceiving adulthood to be, what was the biggest slap in the face for you?
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It's not as cheap as I thought it was.
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Yes, you know, it's not as cheap as I thought it was, and when I break something it doesn't just magically get fixed.
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Our life wasn't really like you know.
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Oh, you know, like the TV's broken, no problem, we're going to buy a new one.
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It wasn't like that, you know.
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It's like you're going to suffer now because you destroyed the TV.
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Yes, you know, I think my kids have it really good.
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Sometimes I'll be actioning things around the house, cleaning up at the table after everybody's eaten, or and it occurred to me like house cleaning up at the table after everybody's eaten, or and it occurred to me like wow, these kids are gonna get a brutal awakening one day.
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I know exactly what you mean.
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They make little memes and snippets of this stuff all the time all the time do you know about the magic coffee table?
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No, you don't know about the coffee table.
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What's that?
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We will post it in our instagram.
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We'll find it and we'll reshare it okay, so that it's on our Instagram.
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I could picture that with some of the things that I take for granted, that I can admit to, for example, body wash.
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Body wash is a great example.
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It's something I absolutely don't think of.
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I know I should and I noticed that, oh my gosh, I think my body wash is magic.
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No matter how many times I use it, no matter how empty it almost is, the next day there's a full thing of body wash.
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You know it's magic, so I get it.
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Okay, what about budgeting and money Getting the things that you need?
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You know jobs, money, responsibility that comes with that.
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I think I perceived it very differently in the sense of budgeting.
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How did you perceive it?
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I mean, I perceived it that, like you know, I work and I have the money to pay for everything and that's just, it's that simple.
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Back in the day, when we were kids, I think it was definitely well more balanced.
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It's like, okay, this is my wage.
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And it's like, don't get me wrong, you could, you know, overspend, of course, but you know like I felt like, okay, homes were 50k.
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You know like homes were 50k.
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Milk was, you know, $1.12.
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Yeah you know, yeah sure you made $700 for the year or something.
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You know what I mean though.
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And and and you know you had to, you know, so you know.
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I think this day and age is very different.
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I think people like just below us generation wise, but I find that they're very lucky, because the social media boom, the crypto boom these were all facets that 20 year olds could kind of get on.
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These very young people with houses the size of like a freaking city hall.
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So you feel, then, that this generation now has more opportunities, different opportunities than we did growing up?
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I think that's the best term for it, because I have zero complaints with everything I'm doing right now the perfect amount of luck, hard work.
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I definitely feel like they have different opportunities and even if we look at our children, it's going to be even different opportunities.
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As always, everything evolves.
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You feel like the opportunities were different.
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I remember growing up high school was really thinking about the career that you wanted to head towards.
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It was really driving home about computers early to mid-90s when I was in high school and now it's more about social media influencer.
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You, the individual, can drive your own future and create your own wealth and your own.
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You don't have to depend on the corporate life anymore and, depending on what kind of person you're talking to, you could go back through the decades at all the different opportunities that they had to kind of grow and build wealth and say I would have loved that or I could have done good there, or I wish I had this.
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Yeah, and I think it's becoming a lot more accepted.
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For example, if my kid came to me and he was like know, I want to be a pro gamer, it isn't so insane as it was if I said that in my era.
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It's like what?
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yeah, get a fucking job yeah exactly.
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You know so and you know you look at.
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You know this kid forget how old you were, like 13 years old won first place in like fortnight and it was like millions of dollars.
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Players, you know they.
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They get supported by their parents but they go out to make, you know, millions of dollars.
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These Players, you know they get supported by their parents but they go out to make, you know millions of dollars.
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These guys are making tons of money off of ads and everything else.
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So you know the opportunities are definitely different.
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Yeah, that's for sure.
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Now like what about work-life balance?
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This is very new to me.
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I have only started now to have a balance.
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Is it something that you've kind of always been working on, or is it something that you're just becoming aware of?
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Really?
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I think it's a little bit of everything.
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As an entrepreneur, you can't have a work-life balance.
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At the beginning it's just not possible.
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You are not going to have friends, your relationships are going to suck because there's no time for anything.
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I'm just going to kind of rewind a little bit.
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Do you think that maybe that is why you do not engage, or like to engage, in social stuff, because you haven't really been in it?
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Yeah, it's very possible For a while because you've kind of not allowed it, because you've been building up your business.
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Very possible.
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I mean, when you're doing 16 hours a day, seven days a week for at least 10 years, there is no time for anything else and that's what it takes.
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You know you have to be absolutely obsessed versus now, because the reputation is there, because all of those things are there, it's like I can finally come down a bit.
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I get to do probably half the amount of work with, you know, a pay that would be 40 hours a week or more.
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So working 20, getting paid for 40 kind of thing, kind of.
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Yeah, and that only comes with time.
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Clientele.
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Clientele reputation, word of mouth, all of that For me, work-life balance it didn't exist.
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Only now do I have that I'm doing all the adulting things that I can do, so and I'm proud.
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I'm happy about that.
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Sometimes I take it for granted.
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There's been a few times where I almost gave up, even this far into my business, where I said, you know, I'm going to look for another job and you know, I'm throwing away the opportunity of being able to do 10 hours a week and get paid for 40 and being able to do 10 hours and see my kids and do all the things with it.
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I think that you know I'm winning, you know, but I'm happier, you know.
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You know how they say money doesn't buy happiness.
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It's a double-edged sword in my opinion, but I think I truly know what that means.
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It's about being financially stable-ish but also having an incredible free life.
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I'm not a guru here, but I think it's only achievable if you have your own business.
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I don't think that's achievable if you're working for someone else.
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I think that would be very difficult.
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For me, work-life balance is really important.
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I've always worked for someone.
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I'm not an entrepreneur, so the jobs that I've had over the years are kind of the nine to five job.
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I have worked a few in the past where it's required to be on call 24-7.
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You have to be there when you're needed.
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The pay never equals the time and effort put in, but those were all learning experiences and learning curves that I think everybody should go through at least once in life to figure out what the hell you want.
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For sure.
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But at the end of the day I personally enjoy a system to my day.
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I go to work, I do my thing, I work hard to get the job done and then I come home and I've forgotten about said job.
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For the most part there's those.
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You have those days.
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You know, you know you're with the kids, you're doing things.
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Obviously there's a lot of adulting in there laundry, lunches, cleaning.
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I really enjoy that process.
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I have thought over the years of what it would be like to be my own boss.
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I've thought of plenty of ideas, of things that I would love to do and, who knows, maybe one day I will.
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But where I'm at in my life right now, I'm happy, I'm good, I feel like my work life balance is probably as good as it's going to get.
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I've worked hard at making sure that I have that.
00:13:58.491 --> 00:14:02.929
Well, stability too, yeah, there's something to be said about stability.
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You know, Of course.
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Yeah, Of course I mean.
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This is why there's so many more employees than there are entrepreneurs.
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Well, I would assume everybody would be owning their own business and nobody would be looking for them.
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I really do think that you have to have certain qualities to be successful entrepreneur.
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You have to have the great idea.
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That's the first thing.
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But then there's the patience, the resilience, the tenacity.
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Keep grinding, keep going, like having that vision, and never wavering.
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You almost have to be a little crazy.
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No, it's true, you almost have to be a little crazy, because you have to love it so much that anyone else, including family, would think you're crazy.
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You're crazy to keep doing this, you know so.
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You have to be so crazy that even when it hurts, you don't want to stop.
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If you look at all the big entrepreneurs, it's always the same common attitude.
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Well, adulting might feel overrated, maybe even a little bit like a scam, but here's the truth.
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It's okay to not have everything figured out.
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We're all just learning as we go, embrace the mess, take it one day at a time and remember none of us have it all together.
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So let's laugh through the chaos and keep supporting each other as we navigate this adulting thing together.
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Share your most relatable adulting fail with us on social media.
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We would love to know what your little thoughts are on this.
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Just a reminder our Instagram handle is brothersisterwhatever.
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See you all next week.
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Bye.
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